Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Weigh in: June 30 - Summer 15 Challenge

I pretty much knew that this week would result in a gain.  Mostly because of all the salty, sweet, sugary, way unhealthy food I've been packing in. Some because of fact that my ankle and leg are still swollen.  I'm not one to blame "water weight" too much but in this case, I'm hoping that when the leg swelling does go away, it will float away a bit of weight that shouldn't be there.  That's what's happened in the past with my foot. 

To make a way long complicated story short: The bones in my ankle are all gobbeldy gook, the Dr.'s really can't explain it or give me a diagnosis.  I have very little movement in the ankle at all. Over the last year or so I've been babying it, big time. Pain went away, movement increased so I decided it was time to get back on the treadmill and see what it could do.  Bad idea. I screwed it up again, then with being on my feet non stop over the weekend cooking and partying, it is all completely swelled up and I'm back to square one with the pain.  I won't whine any more about it, but the treadmill is out. At least the running part, I can maybe do some slow walks in time, but no runner I will be. Now I know.  Moral of the story, I'm still dealing with it and it's all swelled up, it will go away and hopefully a pound or two will go away too.

So I came in today with a gain of 5.2 lbs.  Yuck.

So the stats for the Summer 15 challenge is a total of +4.4 out of -15.  Which means I have to lose 19.4 lbs. to complete the challenge.  Time to get my butt in gear I say!!

Same crud happened today that I've been doing all week. My meals are fine. I'm tracking 1300 - 1400 calories but then I throw something extra in there for no apparent reason and I don't make up for it.  Today, a friend came by with a huge piece of cake. I ate it all.  I didn't even think about it, I just ate.  Then I knew that I should have one fajita for dinner rather than 2 but I didn't.  They were delicious and I ate 2.  So I ate like 500 or so calories that just didn't need to be there. Then I grabbed a handful of M&M's out the door tonight.  Why do I keep doing this!!   Grrr.

This is also linked with Weekly Weigh In over at Marvelous Mommy.  Visit over there and show some support to others!!

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Get over it, I say! Tomorrow's another day!

*sigh*

I am preparing for a gain tomorrow morning on Weigh In day. It won't be pretty.  I re-read some of my posts just a couple short weeks ago about how in control I felt and how I LOVED it. I so want to get that back. 

I do have some excuses for being in a slump. Some valid, some just lame excuses.  It doesn't matter though. I need to get in the right mindset and stop with this "oh screw it I want to eat" attitude. 

Many of these posts are kinda dumb but I need to continue to post something daily. By posting something daily, I am not giving up. I can't.  So even if it is completely horrible results and uninspirational, I will continue to post. 

I had about 1800 calories today. I did super well and then I just ate a way too big dessert for no reason at all and blew it.  Stupid. But whats happened, has happened.  Get over it, I say.  Tomorrow's another day!

Monday, June 28, 2010

Monday!!!??

It's only Monday!!  Really?  Grrr.  Funny how the week just started but it feels like forever and it's been so rotten!  There are too many nummy foods in the house still, kids are sick and my ankle and leg are swelled up to the size of Texas. (don't ask).  The good news is that the "uncontrolled foods" are pretty much gone and I'm hoping to get back to normal.

Didn't I say that 2 days ago???

I love that so many bloggers are doing well and I'm hearing SUCH a positive flow from so many and I am so glad for that. 

I haven't a clue how many calories I ate today, I didn't track at all.  The scale will reflect that, I know it will. Tomorrow I have a plan. I will track what I eat. I will. I will. I will.  I will. 

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Don't Waste Food!??!

Have you ever found yourself eating something that you KNOW you shouldn't be eating, you know that it just needs to be out of the house but you don't want to just throw it away because that would be WASTING IT? 

That makes NO SENSE!

It's hurting our bodies, not helping us AT ALL.  Yet, we feel like it would be wasteful to throw it away. 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's what I just did with a bunch of bars that I made from our party this weekend.  I ate a lot of leftovers today. Too many.  It didn't get really ugly until we decided that the "twix" bars needed to get out of the house.  They were these awesomely, caramelly, crunchy, salty, sweet bars that I made and there were several leftover.  They were goooooooooddddddddddddd!  So my brother, who is watching his calories as well, made the comment "that they need to go away".  So what did I do?

I ATE THEM!!! 

Stupid, stupid, stupid!  My mind is saying that I am going to start clean tomorrow and get back on track.  So THAT gives me permission to eat 800 calories worth of candy bars?  I have no idea how many calories it was but I ate like 4 small bars so it had to be at least that.  Not to mention all the other crap I ate today.

Seriously, IF it is in the house, it would be SOOOOO better to just throw it away. I've even had the thoughts before that if I don't want to eat it, then I'll just give it to my kids.  Well, WHY would I do that?  I'm just setting THEM up for failure by doing that.  Ugh!  Frustrating and annoying is what it is.

We had a blast at the party, great fun but I knew something like this would happen. I knew this wouldn't be a good weekend.  Did I set myself up for failure?  Maybe. Who knows.  I certainly succeeded in failing, that's for sure. 

I so want to wake up tomorrow with a better attitude. I need to.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Party Day!

Whew!  We had a huge luau today, we had 53 people over so with the 6 of us, there were 59 people here.  It was super hot and humid but thankfully the rain held off until about 9 which was perfect.  Everybody had fun. 

I was afraid of eating too much but it was so hectic that I didn't find myself overeating.  Sure I had way more sweets than usual but I didn't overload and I think I did okay.  I snuck in a few Doritos but didn't keep going back for more.  The fact that it was super humid and they got stale pretty quick helped make them less appealing.  No clue how many calories but I'd say it went well.  There are leftovers that will be eaten tomorrow but it shouldn't be too bad. I hope.

Today was the second of 3 stumbling blocks this summer that I foresee. First was the Wisconsin Dells vacation, this party was #2 and #3 stumbling block will be the next vacation in July.  It is still several weeks away and I have a feeling I will be able to control that one a bit more. I am hopeful that I will be able to stay on track and be strict with myself in the weeks preceding that week. 

Friday, June 25, 2010

I have no idea what I ate.

Truthfully, I have no idea what I ate today.  It was SUCH a busy day preparing for the big Luau tomorrow that I don't even remember eating. I certainly didn't over eat. I munched but not on bad stuff.  Tomorrow is another thing, hopefully I can resist all the treats that I made!! 

Have a good weekend!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

The Power Of M&M's

Its funny how your brain is telling you one thing but your hand is doing another. I know the brain directs the hand.  So why are my thoughts telling me to stop eating M&M's but my hand is still grabbing them. Obviously the part of the brain that wants the M&M's is stronger and winning.  I'm reading weight loss blogs, I'm involved in a couple of weight loss challenges, I am NOT happy with the way I look, I WANT to lose weight.  So WHY, tell me WHY, do I eat these M&M's? 

It's ludicrous to eat a Lean Cuisine for dinner and then eat a 150 calorie portion of M&M's while walking to a parade.  It just doesn't make sense.

I was not eating them because I was emotional. It is just something that isn't usually in the house and I wanted them. Plain as that.  So, if they weren't there, I am convinced that I would have stayed at about 1400 calories. I ate about 1200 calories of food today and I would have had another snack if I hadn't been munching on M&M's all day.  I figure I came in at about 1800 calories with the stupid candy. Why? 

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Weigh In: June 23 - Summer 15 Challenge

Weigh in Wednesday.  I used to like Wednesdays.  They made me feel like the week was half over.  Now, weighing myself first thing in the morning on a Wednesday, I feel like a new week is starting.

I lost .8 lbs.  An even pound would have felt better.  It was to be expected that it wasn't better, I didn't eat the greatest. Not horrible but not superbulous either.  Alas, a loss is a loss and I'll take it. I"m trying to eat small for the next several days as we have a Luau for about 60 people on Saturday and I am preparing the food!  And it's NOT healthy!!

Hopefully I'll be too busy entertaining guests to eat a ton.  It's usually when I am putting all the food away that I start to munch on leftovers.  We'll see, it should be fun. 

Today went well. I came in at about 1400 calories, even with a piece of butterscotch Amish cake/bread.  Yummers.

So for the Summer 15 Challenge, I am at .8 out of 15.  The goal is to lose 15 lbs. by September 7th.  I need to get my butt in gear!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Staying Busy!

Busy day. Not much happened. I'm preparing for a Luau coming up on Saturday and we have 50++ people probably going to be here! Busy, busy.  It's nice to stay busy, then I don't want to eat. As much.  I think it's the days that I sit around bored where I more feel the impulse just to eat for the heck of it. 

I even snacked on some new M & M's with pretzel middles. Yummers, the package was about 150 calories. I rationalized it because I gave my daughter my baked potato for dinner.  For some reason, I made only 4 rather than 5 so I gave it to her and then we were out the door after dinner.  Granted the baked potato  would have filled me more and been more nutritious but the M&M's tasted awesome!

So the day came in at about 1450 calories.  Still not enough water, I think. I'm not tracking it but I just don't think it's enough.  Tomorrow is weigh in day, let's hope the scale is in a good mood!!

Monday, June 21, 2010

Good News and Bad News

First I want to give a shout out to Fat Dude's Blog, he just started his journey and has lost 4 lbs. on week 1 and he's super psyched.  Plus he keeps on losing everytime he peeks on the scale.  Head on over quick and give him a congrats for me!! 

So do you want the good news or the bad news????

Ok, the bad news is that I didn't get on the treadmill or do any real exercising except for my constant cleaning of the house. That doesn't count as I do that everyday. I did sorta have an excuse, my ankle has been hurting all day.  Not going to bore you with details but my ankle IS a valid excuse but it's been SO much better and last week, much as I hated every minute on the treadmill, my ankle was fine. Not sure why today was bad.  Maybe tomorrow.  I'm mad because it was my goal to do SOMETHING, even if it wasn't the treadmill. But, alas, nothing was accomplished. 

On to the good news. Eating went great, I stayed in control and I wasn't hungry!  Breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks, all right on track.  I came in at about 1400 TOPS, I estimated a couple of things and I have a feeling it's more like 1300 but just in case, we're going with 1400.  Not quite enough water though. I need to work on that some more.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Pizza and M&M's

My kids are training with me for the 5K.  Let me rephrase that. THEY are training for a 5K, I am just trying to get my butt on the treadmill as often as possible with the hopes of MAYBE doing a 5K. 

All 3 kids are doing well.  It's funny to see their different personalities about running. My daughter, who is 13, is doing better than I thought. She has about 10 - 15 extra lbs. on her but she's running well.  My oldest son, who is 11,  is a born runner and I know will kick all of our butts. My youngest son, who is 8, is just like me. He's willing to get on the treadmill and train but he hates it.  Just like me.  By the way, I am not pushing them really hard and I'm not forcing them to do anything they don't want to do.  I also told them they don't HAVE to do the 5K, they can just do the kids 1K that they did last year if they want.  My oldest son totally wants to do the 5K and the younger one only says he does because his brother is doing it. We'll see. They are all doing great though!

I started off super good with food this morning. I had my egg bagel, then a light lunch.  Then, unfortunately, we brought home pizza and breadsticks.  I had chicken thawing in the frig but it was getting late so we just brought home pizza. I didn't have too much but it did bring my total up higher than I was hoping for today. 

I finished the day at about 1800 calories.  That's also with the Peanut M&M's that I snagged while counting them for a guess-how-many game for our kids party coming up.  I still stayed in control so that was okay. 

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Put The Chips Back!

Today was a disappointing day.  Several personal issues came up that were disturbing and I'm ending the day a little bit sad.

I wanted to eat. 

I still want to eat.

Chips are pretty much a taboo in the house because they are my favorite. My biggest weakness.  We still have a few bags left from vacation that I threw in the cupboard. 

I grabbed a pack of Doritos. I wasn't hungry. But I wanted to eat them.  I knew that eating them would not stop the sadness but I just wanted a moment of comfort.  That's all it would have taken for me to eat them.  A moment. 

I saw that they were 260 calories for the bag.  I really didn't want to add 260 calories to my total for the day. 

I put the chips back. Sigh.  There are going to be other not-so-good days but I have to "keep putting the chips back" and not letting food be my comfort. 

I ate about 1500 calories today.  I am so glad I put the chips back.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Stay Focused. Always.

I didn't do as well as I'd hoped today.  It was my own fault. I ate and then I calculated. Wrong way to do it.  I need to plan, calculate and THEN eat.  THAT is what works for me.  I didn't plan my snacks accordingly and I munched. Not a lot but I didn't stay focused. 

Grabbing a pretzel here and there isn't going to make a huge bit of difference on the calorie count at the end of the day.  BUT, what is does, is it gives me silent permission to do it again. It's like, "If I eat a pretzel in the morning, then it's okay to have a couple in the afternoon".  Then it gets into, "If I munched on just a few yesterday, I can have a few today."  Pretty soon, I'm munching throughout the day and I've lost my focus. 

What works for me is to plan ahead.  Plan to eat 10 pretzels at 2:00, that's okay. But I can't just munch.  I can't. I won't succeed.

I came in at about 1800 calories for the day.  I ate 2 cookies that totally put me over the top. Granted, they were whole wheat, packed with fiber, healthy-ish cookies but still.  I didn't need them. I especially didn't eat the last one I just ate.  I ate it because it was just there.  Grrrr.  I should have written this post before the cookie!! 

Tomorrow I will plan. Tomorrow I will keep my focus.  I have to. 

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Beans! Beans! The magical fruit!

I ate a lot of beans today. I didn't mean to, it just sorta happened. 

I made baked beans last night.  They were awesome. I LOVE baked beans, I tend to eat way too many of them because they are soooooooo good. Healthy as they are, one cup of my beans is about 375 calories.  A cup is quite filling so that's okay. 

So Hubs had to work last night so we had a ton of baked beans leftover.  I decided to eat a cup for breakfast. I wasn't in the mood to deal with eggs and these looked good and I knew they would fill me up.  They did.  So then lunch comes around and after I feed the 1100 kids in my house, I'm not in the mood to make something for myself.  Laziness kicks in. So.  Beans it is.  Again. 

Did I mention that I love baked beans? 

I had some other snacks in there too but then comes dinner.  It's hot and humid, Hubs is working again so we're not doing a major production for food.  The kids ate waffles, ham and fruit. I opened the freezer and had a Chipotle Bean Burger from Morningstar. 

These babies ROCK! I love them!  I buy them at Costco and I could seriously eat them daily.  Only 210 calories per patty.  So I make a salad with the chipotle bean burger, lettuce, tomatoes and sour cream for dinner.  It was awesome. 

So. Moral of the story, I ate beans, beans and then more beans.  Quite the beany day. 

You DO know what happens when you eat too many beans, don't you?? 

NOTHING! 

I am totally not affected by beans.  They are healthy, they fill me up and I love them.  No regrets about the bean day.  Even though I did take in a bit too many calories than I wanted to.  I came in at about 1600. I'm good with that. 

(and there is about a half of a cup of baked beans still in the refrigerator)  tee-hee.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Dead Even

Sigh. So week one, I lost 6 lbs.  Then came vacation, I ate like a horse, didn't weigh in for a week and now, 2 weeks later. I'm even.  Still at a 6 lb. loss.  I have a digital scale that tells me to the 10th of a lb. but for some reason I've been rounding. I'm going to stop that and track exactly. 

So 6 lbs. for 3 weeks averages to 2 lbs. a week which is more than respectable. I'm mad at myself for going SO FAR off track during my vacation. I am doing pretty good at home so I am hoping for success as the weeks go on. 

I got on the treadmill again today.  Only a mile but at least I did it.

I ate decently. I swerved from the plan this afternoon but tried to make up for it. I came in about 1500 - 1600 calories. Not great, but not bad.  I can live with that.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Thank You!

I read a lot of weight loss blogs.  They all inspire me. The one that has been particularly inspiring lately is Anti-Jared.  He is posting to ME. He is telling ME that this is not an impossible journey. He is wants me to remember that "there will be good days and bad days but ...the good days can overpower the bad days".

I enjoy cheering people on during their weigh loss struggles because to give THEM motivation, I am giving MYSELF motivation.  All the advice and thoughts I give to them - I need that same advice and motivation.  So in telling them my thoughts, I feel like I am reaffirming my goals and what I need to accomplish to succeed. 

It's working. I have been successful. 

Sure there have been those good days and the bad days and even the really bad days. But the good days HAVE overpowered the bad days. 

I have lost 91 lbs. so far.  I have that much more to lose.

I can do it on my own. However, having the help of fellow bloggers who share the same struggles as me is comforting.  Not that I enjoy other people struggling.  But it helps me realize I'm not alone.  So thank you weight loss bloggers for helping me succeed. For inspiring me.  For writing for me.

Now, on to today.  I ate well.  I had more cake. It was okay. I came in at about 1400 calories.  And I'm not hungry, that's good.

Weigh In: June 15 - Summer 15 Challenge

Ok, so I JUST found out about a weight loss challenge from Plus Size Bloggers.   It's the summer 15 challenge. It goes from June 15th to September 7th and the challenge is to lose 15 lbs. and continually post results on your blog.  I'm psyched because I so need this extra motivation to lose weight!! 

So this is an extra post, just for them, announcing my official weight. My official weigh in day is tomorrow morning but I will go with what I was at this morning as they need the first weight today.  Deep breath!  234.  Sigh.  I'm dead even where I was 2 weeks ago.  I'll post more about it tomorrow on official weigh in day. 

Monday, June 14, 2010

"It's not really that big of a deal if I'm fat, is it?"

I got back on the treadmill today!  Big accomplishment for me. Everyone keeps telling me that once you get used to it you learn to love it and crave it.  I SOOOOOOO hope that is true because as of now, I am neither loving it nor craving it.  In fact, I hate it.  Really and truly.  I hate that my feet get so hot that I want to rip my shoes off the moment I get off. I hate that after 15 minutes I start rationalizing "It's not really that big of a deal if I'm fat, is it?".  Seriously, after 15 minutes.  Pathetic.  But, I stick with it despite the degrading mindset. So I've been going a mile and I'm going to attempt to get on it 3 - 4 days a week. I'll stick with my 1 mile for now until hopefully my body cooperates slightly. 

It's Amish cake/bread day.  You know what that means?  I ate too much.  Not TOO bad mind you but I certainly took in extra calories with the Amish cake/bread.  It was good too.  My last 2 that I made were delicious but I over baked them so they weren't quite as good as they could have been.  This one was pistachio, pineapple & coconut and it was cooked perfectly! I'll be blogging about it tomorrow on my recipe blog.  

I figure with the extra calories with the bread, I took in about 1800 calories. Not bad considering the fairly big chunk that I ate of the cake/bread.  Still, way more than I need or care to take in, especially after vacation.  Weigh in on Wednesday.  I think I'm hoping to break even.  That would be success. I think.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Grocery Shopping While Hungry

I slept late today. It felt good.  Only on Sundays that option is available and I take it!  My baby is 8 now so when the kids get up, they don't necessarily need us right away so they let us sleep.  Nice. 

So I started the day late, ate my normal breakfast and just grabbed a Nature Valley granola bar while heading out the door. 

After our meeting, we stopped by the grocery store to pick up a few things. I was hungry! I hate to go to the grocery store while hungry.  The temptations are always there but when you are hungry the temptations seem way more intense.  Well, I resisted them all! Even with the kids clamoring for chips, Little Debbie snack cakes and all that junk that they want.  I stuck to the list (which was mostly veggies) and we were out of there.  Success!

So by the time we came home for dinner I was STARVING!  Like give me food NOW kind of starving. I scarfed a banana because unfortunately I was making a somewhat time consuming dinner.  I was just making meatballs but they take awhile to make, brown and finish off in the oven.  Plus I made a couple of different sauces for the meatballs as we were taste testing sweet and sour sauces.  I'll blog about the taste test in a week or so, I happen to have a stock pile of new recipes to be posted but eventually I'll go a week without wanting to cook anything original and get caught up.  :-)

So I had about 460 calories before dinner and I probably had 1000 calories for dinner.  Big dinner.  I ate a lot of meatballs and then had a small salad.  The meatballs were about 80 calories a piece, maybe less as I made them small but I ate like 12 of them.  I'm totally full and not going to eat a snack so I'll finish up the day with about 1500 calories.  I'm good with that.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Dusting Off the Treadmill

I actually got on the treadmill today.  I've been whining to myself that "I've got to get off my butt and start exercising" but today I actually did it.  I am hoping that can make it a habit. 

I have a crazy notion that I would like to run a 5K this fall.  I'm reading all over the blogs that people are running or training to run a 5k.  Well, if they can do it, I certainly can! (was that me that just said that?)

I'm not committing, I might weenie out but it's been floating around in my head for awhile.  I figure if I don't start training now it will never happen.  I walked/ran (mostly walked) a mile today and it was ugly.  Embarrassingly ugly.  I know it will get easier though if I just. Keep. Doing it. 

Eating went well today.  I had planned a nice healthy dinner tonight but then I realized it was just me and the kids for supper.  My son asked for an apple with peanut butter.  Well, I had a peanut butter dip recipe that I got from Food Junkie From Texas and I decide to make that for the kids.  Well, let me tell you, it was smashingly good and I think I ended up eating like 1/2 of it. After reviewing the calories, I decided I ate about 650 calories in apple and peanut butter dip so that was dinner.  Hey, it was protein and fruit so it wasn't THAT bad.  I ended the day with a 100 calorie chocolate vitatop and came in just under 1500 calories for the day.  I'd say success for the day!

Friday, June 11, 2010

Control

Breathe. 

I like to be in control.

I don't think I am a controlling person, in the sense that it has to be "my way or the highway" or anything like that. But I don't like "going with the flow" or having the "whatever happens, happens" attitude.  I seriously get sorta panicky when I don't know what's coming next or if things are left to chance.

This applies to several areas of my life but what I'm focusing here is control over what I eat.  I don't like not being in control.  I can't leave it to chance. Or it gets ugly.  As I saw on vacation. 

This is a fairly new revelation for me.  I spent my whole life not in control and grew to be over 300 lbs. at one time.  My life changed, got exceedingly busier with 3 kids and I slowly gained control. Over my life. Over my eating.

While I was on vacation I lost some control. Not all of it but enough. I didn't enjoy it and today was like a breath of fresh air.  I regained my control.  For today.

I had a good eating day.  I planned and knew what was coming ahead and ate accordingly.  Breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks went according to planned and I am finishing up a bowl of 100 calorie popcorn. I'll finish up just under 1400 calories for the day.

Breathe.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Back from vacation and scared of the scale!

Back from vacation!  Whew! It's always nice to go but it's also nice to get back.  We actually came back a day early.  We were done.  We had enough days swimming at the waterparks, sunning ourselves, eating and doing lots of activities. 

Notice I mentioned eating.  Yes, we ate. A lot.  It wasn't pretty. 

I did make some good choices.  MUCH better choices than I would have a couple of years back.  I am mad because I COULD have made SOOOO many better choices than I did.  It just seemed to get worse as the days went by. I started good and then it progressively just got worse.  Grrr.  I thought of taking pictures but I didn't want any reminders of the junk. I really only want to take pictures of the stuff I am proud of. 

Breakfast was good.  Oatmeal and fruit. Lunch was good.  Sandwich and fruit. Snacks and dinner were horrible.  Wayyyyyyyy too many snacks and for the most part they weren't healthy. 

That is another reason I am totally glad we came back a day early. I am determined to start back up tomorrow planning my meals and counting the calories. 

I'm not planning to weigh in until Wednesday.  That gives me PLENTY of time to shape up and get some good numbers.  I ate so much junk this week that if I just break even by Wednesday, I will consider that a success. 

Still, I'm scared of the scale. 

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Vacation!!

I have mixed feelings about vacation.  On the one hand. I'M ON VACATION!!  WOO-HOO!!  On the other hand. I'm on vacation?  What am I going to eat??!!

Typically, vacation means eating out.  A lot.  We cut out eating out a couple of years back.  We don't do it often anymore at all.  But for the next 6 days, I'll be 4 hours from home in Wisconsin Dells, living in a hotel. 

I do well with dieting when I am in my own environment. Bring me somewhere else and I fall apart.  Though I'm getting better.  Today the vacation unofficially started.  We went to a buffet for dinner. Yup. A buffet.  Sigh. 

I did fairly well, I made good choices. I skipped the pop and skipped the dessert bar entirely.  I avoided breads and things that were obviously swimming in grease and butter.  But I did eat way too much.  I really don't even know how to count how many calories I consumed.  But I know that the "old me" would have easily consumed 1000 + more calories by drinking pop, eating dessert and stuffing myself beyond belief.  So I kept my head. I'm happy about that. 

Then I came home and at a piece of White Chocolate Craisin Almond Amish Bread that I made today. Really??  So not necessary. It wasn't like I was even hungry! My mouth just wanted it.  Sigh. I gave away one loaf and I'm leaving what's left here with my brother.

But then there is the next 6 days. I won't be weighing in on Wednesday because I'll be in Wisconsin Dells. We'll be living in a hotel and soaking in the sun at the waterparks.  The weather isn't supposed to be HOT but nice enough. I hope.  So we're going to go to a lot of restaurants. I'm really going to try to stay focused and make good choices.  I packed better things to eat than what I usually bring.  I'm eating oatmeal for breakfast, no donuts or pastry's.  I have healthy snacks, not ding dongs and twinkies.  I have individual packs of chips, not big bags that I can't stop sticking my hand into.  If I can just make good choices at the restaurants, I'll be good. I'm certainly not going to LOSE weight this week but if I can keep from gaining then I will totally consider it a success. 

Talk to you all on Friday night and I'll give you the update!

Friday, June 4, 2010

Pizza and Candy

So I did pretty good with calories today but not so much healthy though.  I meant to have leftovers for lunch but instead ended up eating leftover pizza crusts and 2 slices of frozen pizza.  Grrr.  Luckily it kept me full enough for the afternoon. Breakfast was my usual egg, ham sandwich.  Today on a whole wheat bagel. Blueberries for morning snack.

I had an awesome dinner!  I made a chicken parmesan baked in the oven with homemade chunky italian sauce for about 400 calories!  Yea! It was so delicious!  I'd love to share the recipe with you now but I'm going on vacation in 2 days so I won't be posting it for awhile.  I have some things scheduled to post on my recipe blog during my vacation but not this meal.  Check it out though, I just posted some awesome Grilled Island chicken!

I also ate a fun size butterfinger for dessert. I haven't had chocolate in awhile and it was good!  (of course, duh!)  We were at the dollar tree and the kids wanted candy. I wanted to get the Reese's Peanut Butter cup 8 pk, but they were 80 calories a piece.  The butterfinger 8 pk. were almost half that.  So, the butterfingers won.  I wanted one. 

So I came in probably just under 1500 calories for the day.  It might have been less, I had to estimate on the pizza but I think I estimated pretty high.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Packed with Protein

I ate leftovers from last night for lunch and for dinner. We had lentil sloppy joes and a quinoa apple almond salad.  Last night I left the table super full. Today, they did the same, they completely satisfied me so I didn't want more and I didn't feel the need to snack.  I'm really learning that foods high in protein and fiber REALLY work with keeping me full.  This is SO important!  So I'm really trying to keep on track for eating the right things so I can stay good with calories yet NOT be hungry. 

For breakfast, I've been having an egg beater sandwich of some sort. This week, I am putting my egg beaters and slice of ham on a Sara Lee Whole Wheat Bagel for 130 calories. It has a lot of protein and fiber and I can tell that it is keeping me full longer than when I put the egg and ham on a regular english muffin.  Big difference.  My favorite for breakfast muffins are the bagel thins.  They taste super awesome!

I came in just over 1300 calories today.  That was with a spoonful of chocolate ice cream and about 6 McDonalds french fries.  I caved and let the husband bring home nuggets and fries for the kids as I was having leftovers.  I had planned a 100 calorie snack this evening but I wasn't hungry and didn't need it.  Yea!  This feels good, I so want to keep this up!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Weigh In Wednesday 6/40

So this morning I weighed in.  I'm down 6 lbs.  Success!!  It's pretty typical of me to lose a lot on week one of dieting. I'm usually good at being pretty strict and careful. It's maintaining that attitude and strictness!  I won't be weighing in next Wednesday as I am on vacation so my next weigh in will be in 2 weeks. 

So my short term goal is 40 lbs. by the end of the year.  So we're 6/40. I will NOT by a long shot be "done" after this 40 lbs. but it hopefully will give me the confidence to keep going. Plus, I will be lower in weight than my entire adult life. 

I still have not worked exercise into this at all.  I lost about 100 lbs. with minimal extra exercise. This is going to catch up to me eventually.  I have to start something.  Soon.

I finished up the day with a bit under 1400 calories.  And I am FULL! I had the most awesome dinner that was completely vegetarian for 522 calories and I am completely full.  I love it!  I won't be posting it in my recipes until after my vacation though.  Great day!  Yea!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Ice Cream and Hunger

I was hungry today.  Which is annoying. I ate good, ate a lot of protein. Pretty much my normal stuff. But I was hungry. By the time dinner came, I was ravenous but then felt good.  I had steak, grilled pineapple and baked beans.  Filled me right up. I even ate 2 extra pieces of pineapple because they were SO sweet and just like dessert!

Then came ice cream. I was scooping some up for the kids and I took a spoonful.  Then another.  Okay, it was 3 small spoonfulls.  Ugh!  It isn't like it was the end of the world but I just so didn't need to end the day with ice cream.  Oh well.

I came in at about 1500 calories, maybe a bit less.  So it was a good day.   Tomorrow is the weigh in!!